Doing things once

I've just discovered that doing THE WHOLE job the first time means I don't have to come back later and finish it - it's done. Want something out of the dryer? Get the whole load out! Rubbish bin overflowing? Bag it up and take it out to the bin rather than leaving it at the back door for "when I'm just passing through and I feel like taking it out" (because that's usually never). Brilliant!

Now to apply this to my songwriting. Maybe I should try actually finishing a song, which I haven't done in way too long. Maybe I'm wasting energy writing fragments, when I could be channeling and focusing it to produce whole pieces. Maybe that would help me move my focus away from the tiny details (which I'm already good at) to the broader flow and structure of the song (which I'm not so good at). Potentially brilliant!

The tension of anticipation

Why can't I resist chocolate in the house? The only way for me to not eat buckets and buckets of it is to not have it anywhere near me. Why? I know that it will taste so much better after some time off, yet I keep nomming, thinking that every next bite will be just as good as the first, but it never quite is. Why can't I delay the immediate gratification for the greater enjoyment? What is it about the passing of time that I can't handle without going for another tasty bite? Is it that I value the experience of chocolate-eating so highly that I devalue the myriad of other potentially very enjoyable experiences in my day? So, then, I convince myself that I need the chocolate otherwise there'll be no other good things in my day? Maybe. I do know one thing, though. It is that focusing on the very moment I am in right now is helping me to appreciate how much good is actually going on. Like here, now, I'm blabbing about whatever the hell I feel like and it feels good. I like that others might relate to what I'm talking about, and yet I don't care if they don't because the blog is really just for me right now. So, clearly, this moment is enjoyable, and good. Though, if I were just thinking about going for the next and the next and the next piece of the supposed all-magical chocolate block, I wouldn't see this moment for what it is. Interesting, very interesting. And also, the other day I found that while there were things in the future that were stressing me out, focusing on where I was right there and then, and what I was doing, I realised that that moment was good, and that it could quite do without the stress of what may or may not be a problem in the future. It was quite a revelation to realise how disconnected each moment is from the next (though obviously they are connected in other ways). Project for self: spend a day noticing the moments. As many as possible, whatever is happening. Then note how important the all-magical chocolate seems. (I don't care how touchy-feely this seems - it was quite a revelation.)

Too many interesting things

There are just too many interesting things in the world to be able to absorb them all. Most of what I read, I'd say, goes into my subconscious, only to be retrieved when external things call it to mind. I can't intentionally go back and get the information because I've forgotten it's even there. And even when it does come to mind, only the general vibe returns, with very few of the specifics. I feel this makes for a very reactive, reflexive way of making decisions and means that often I can't fully articulate why I have made such a decision. I also have trouble recalling enough information to be able to explain a concept I've read about to another person. I can only wonder that this might be greatly decreasing my quality of life, given the amount of time I actually spend reading (most of the day!) - I have so little to show for my time. I'd really rather feel like I've spent my time well. Maybe I can learn to filter, to acknowledge my own boundaries, that I can't internalise every piece of information and discussion that looks interesting. Instead, I can choose - yes, choose! - to focus on things that seem overly interesting, and humbly allow the others to pass me by in the proverbial river of time. Who knows, perhaps I'll float by then again later down stream, but in the mean time, I'll at least be better able to enjoy where I'm currently at. Maybe I'll learn something worthwhile that I could possibly even be able to pass on to others. Sounds a lot more satisfying, and a lot less depressing.

Freewriting

Freewriting is cool. It's really helping me to access/organise my thoughts - something I have long needed. I got an intro to it via the audiobook of Accidental Genius by Mark Levy, who seems to have gotten a lot of his inspiration from Peter Elbow's Writing With Power. Might read that soon. In the mean time though, Levy's book has given me more than enough to experiment with.

Letting people interact with your product

On seeing a particular car drive by us the other day, Mike mentioned how he really liked it because he used to drive it in a car racing game. And yet, car manufacturers were (at least at one point) against having their branded cars in such games because apparently they thought it would be bad for them if people could smash their cars up in games. Turns out maybe not - at least with Mike. This made me think about how we tend to remember a lot from our adolescence, like the music we listen to, the friendships we had, and clearly for some, the cars we drive in computer games. If people will attach positive emotional memories to things in adolescence, it makes sense that they're more likely to have some positive attachment to them in adulthood. Perhaps Mike would consider buying such a car at some point. Message for me: adolescents are a powerful bunch to target for future product appeal. At the moment I just have my songs, and I'm really just writing them to discover my own artistic voice at the moment, but who knows, maybe in the future I'll have a more general product that I'd like people to get on board with for the long haul - maybe then I'd look at how to get adolescents to interact with it, get familiar with it, and feel some sense of ownership of, even before they've bought it.

Starting blogging. Again.

I tried to start blogging a few years ago. Basically nothing happened. I didn't know what to write about, didn't know what people would want to read, and set a high standard for myself in terms of writing quality and thoroughness. 

Now I'm taking a different tack. I'm just going to write whatever takes my fancy, no matter how short, no matter whether people are interested or not. That way, I can hopefully get into some sort of rhythm of blogging without too much expectation of myself (the expectation of perfection being quite likely the root of my procrastination). It might even be one sentence! Whatever the case - I want to blog and I think this might be one of the only ways to get myself started.

The posts will get very little editing and may not even make sense to anyone other than me. The ideas could be vague, easily misinterpreted and possible even misleading due to lack of thoroughness and clarity. I guess the point is that at the moment, this blog is for me to vomit my semi-digested (mmm!) thoughts, and get into some sort of habit. Maybe then I'll start to make it more accessible. So, if you're reading these posts, know that you are looking into my barely filtered brain. The posts are not designed to be correct or scientific, as much I would like to be able to make them in the future.